Wednesday, September 14, 2005

It's been a while
I haven't blogged in like ... a million years. I dont even remember the last time i did. Oh well.

I just noticed I have hair on my knuckle. But only on one hand. Perhaps this means the right side of my body is growing old faster than the left side of my body.

Or perhaps it means nothing at all.

It's still 80 degrees outside. I never knew New York had the same climate as Hawaii in the summer. That's weird. Except it smells distinctly like ass and garbage here. Hawaii ... Doesn't smell like anything. Sunscreen maybe.

In a few months New York will have the same climate as Sweden. Weird how that works.

I think they should replace all the subways with underground moving sidewalks. That way you would never have the oh-so-disheartening feeling of missing your train. They could sell advertising all over the inside of the tunnels too and make tons of money. Perhaps just enough to pay for all the electricity lighting all of that tunnel space would take.

I'm no city planner.

I'm really just updating this so I dont go home tonight and listen to Kc say, "You're a bad blogger." Go watch Emeril Live you evil shrew!

Now I will go walk to Whole Foods and ponder my choices of salad, sushi, soup or indian food. They should really have a taco bar there. Maybe I'll suggest that. Who am I kidding. I'm surprised anyone in this city even knows what a taco is.

Have I mentioned that all the Mexican restaurants here are run by Puerto Ricans in sombreros? They are.

Also, recently I had an epiphany. You see, I tell everyone who isn't from here that I come into contact with that, "New York drivers are INSANE. It's cut-throat man. Cut-throat." But I've realized that this may, in fact, not actually be true. My only car experiences consist of riding in cabs or moving my car around the block to avoid street cleaning related tickets. Perhaps the only drivers that are actually insane are cab drivers and the drivers who work for car services. I wouldn't be surprised.

A while back, I was riding to the airport in the back of a cab--a minivan, mind you--and I found myself complimenting the driver on all of his killer maneuvers. Most notably, he skipped a 50-car-long left turn lane and cut off the guy 2nd in line by about a centimeter. He seriously exploited what was no larger than a 4 foot gap between vehicles. It was amazing. He saved us the wait between 4 red lights. He turned to me with a huge shit eating grin on his face when I suddenly exclaimed from the back seat, "NICE! That was one of the sweetest driving maneuvers I've ever seen!"

Cab drivers are either the shittiest or most awesome dudes in the world.

I wonder if the Wendy's by my work has that new BBQ Ranch Chicken Sandwich yet. I probably shouldnt eat that anyway. Dammit. I'm becoming bulemic.