Tuesday, April 06, 2004

today i was attacked by a goose
I ride the bus to work every morning and, in doing so, i have to walk across an undeveloped field, owned by Nintendo, that has a bunch of wetlands and an old unused parking lot in it. There are always these 2 geese wandering around in there which I've always done my best to avoid since I know geese are little fuckers who will chase you around and bite your ass and stuff -- Not this goose.

Today I was walking across the parking lot, a little bit behind these 2 guys I dont know and about 20 feet to their right. the goose was walking across the parking lot right near them, but still pretty far from me. i figured as long as i kept these two guys between me and the ever more agitated goose, i'd be alright. wrong. the goose got in front of the 2 guys and started doing this weird open mouthed neck bend thing, then it took off and flew directly at my head. now, call me a wiener if you want, but it's a little disconcerting when a pissed off 40 pound bird is hurtling towards your head. suffice it to say, i squealed like a girl and ran away ... even after i swore up and down to everyone i know that if that dumb goose ever attacked me that i'd punt it like a football. foolishly, i never expected the aerial attack. damn. when i go home today i'm going to carry a stick ... we'll see if that stupid goose wants to see my ted williams imitation on its face.

in other news: I'm perfecting my running for president idea. its going to be amazing. i even have a publicist already.