Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Let's talk about my morning bus adventure
I was lucky this morning, because as I walked to my first bus stop, the bus pulled up and I stepped on. No waiting, just prompt bussly service. Sweet, too bad the awesomeness of this bus was to be short lived. Once my bus made it into the University District it either hit a dude on a bike or a car in front of the bus hit a dude on a bike. I'm not really sure. Either way, the bus driver stopped the bus in some random spot to help some dude who had been hit and thrown into a flower bed by an automobile. The dude was bummed. (I just said "dude" way too many times) I'm pretty sure the bus didn't hit this guy, the bus driver wasn't freaking out enough like it was his fault. The bike guy didn't even look all that badly hurt ... his face was definately bleeding though. So anyway, the bus driver asked him if he wanted an ambulance, the bus driver called for one and then everyone on the bus realized that the bus driver had simply decided not to finish the route ... as if there weren't already 15 people standing around making sure this guy was ok. What bus driver just doesn't finish his route? This is a public service, not Hands Across America. I've got to get to work. But no, I guess things are different when you're a bus driver. At my job I can't just decide to stop working because I've stumbled upon a bird with a hurt wing or a little girl with a tough algebra problem. No, I've got to keep doing what I get paid to do because people are sitting around waiting on me. It doesn't work that way when you're a bus driver though. You've got to stop and dick around on the side of the road because of some dumbass who fell off his bike. Anyway, everyone on the bus; we were all screwed.

So, I got off the bus and began walking ... Pissed. I walked to the stop where I usually switch busses and waited for like 10 minutes for the connecting bus to come. On THIS bus there was this guy who I thought was passed out who looked like Andrew W.K. ... No, seriously. I thought he was passed out until some retarded lady trying to get to Burien got on the bus, then he woke up and made friends with her. I found out from the very loud conversation they were about to have that she had brain surgery and wasn't actually retarded. She told the Andrew W.K. dude a bunch of lame jokes ("Why did Raggedy Anne go South? She was looking for the Andes!" To which the guy replied, "Oh, I get it ... South America!") Once the two exchanged bad jokes (the guy had one too; "Did you hear about the Irishman who walked out of the bar? ... It could happen." The non-retard-brain-surgery-lady didn't get it) the guy got a phone call and announced, "my pants are on fire." Then he proceeded to have a conversation on the phone where he informed some other guy that he should go to the house where Andrew W.K. guy lives to calm down his girlfriend (this guy did not look like the type ANY woman would be into .... he looked like Andrew W.K. ... Only actually poor) because "she's on one of her tirades" and that the guy he was talking to on the phone should "keep her from calling the cops." word. I got off the bus.

At this point I'm wicked late for work. I've basically turned a ten minute bus ride into 45 minutes of bus riding, but I've still got another bus to catch. So I walk down the steps to the Montlake flyer stop and find out the next bus I can take doesn't come for almost another half hour. Great. It came, there was nowhere to sit, unless you're me and got the second to last seat and watched everyone else who got on after me have to stand. suckers.

So there you go. Yes, if you did the math, you will realize that I ride three busses to work. Three. That's a lot. There's some other way I could go where I'd only have to ride 2 busses, but it involves going downtown, so I'm pretty sure that sucks. Oh well.

Yesterday on my way home I saw this drunk arabian guy almost pick a fight with the bus driver. It was awesome. He looked like he had just got off work being an 8th grade math teacher. Awesome.